Crimson's Transmogrifying Page

I've got explosions where I used to eyes.

-The Faraway Places


Every page on the net is "under construction". These pages are "under mutation"; they change every time they are visited, barring a few nescessary constants. If you're lazy enough to stay here fifteen minutes and your browser supports META tags, we'll reload the page for you.

Service offer: send me unsolicited, "bulk" (commercial or non) email, and I'll proof it for 50 dollars a line! See here for more info on my valuable offer!

If you want to be blackholed at the gweep.net mail server, thou cockered crook-pated giglet, send mail to my old flame-bucket or to an old address. If you don't like something about these pages, or wish to correlate address scraping thou impertinent pox-marked ratsbane, send mail to my current flame-bucket. If you like something about these pages, send mail to web-comment where scraped appears in the mailto link.

Peeve-of-the-Moment:
Rude people.

Well-known Joe Fact Number 808:
Rev. Ivan Stang owes him three undelivered issues of the Stark First of Removal, and has since 198-mumble.

"A construct made of cloned human tissue, augments, anxiety, depression, and unforcused rage, a killing machine for whichever humans rented me, until I made a mistake and got my brain destroyed."

I recommend you visit New Ways Of Thinking or checking out the online game Lost ... before it is too late.

Want more spew? There's a bug in my office. Let's eavesdrop on the engineers...

And as a parting shot, today's Weekly World Spew headline:

Amazing! Brunettes Winning Prizes for Letting the Air out of People's Tires!

Cheers,
joe